Sunday, March 05, 2006

Charles Banned for Speaking Out

The Standards Board for Royalty announced this morning that it has suspended the Prince of Wales for 'bringing his office into disrepute'.
The outspoken Prince, 57, has made a number of controversial public comments over the years, on subjects from horticulture to architecture.
A spokesman for the Standards Board, Brian Meddling-Quango, said: "This has gone on long enough. The time has come to act. Charles Windsor has been suspended from office for a period of one month with immediate effect."
The ruling was greeted with dismay by many commentators.
"It is a twavesty that in this countwy a democwatically-elected Prince of Wales can be removed from his post by people who owe their authority to nothing more than the Pwime Minister's favour," Roy Hattersley told reporters last night from his seat in the House of Lords.
While he serves his ban, the Prince's duties will be carried out by his butler, Sir Nigel Dhrinkskaddie. If the Queen should die during the period of suspension, Sir Nigel will succeed to the throne in place of the Prince.

1 comment:

  1. Not far from the truth, appart from The royal master of the Chamberpot. (poo inspector) Rupert Chinless-wonder, has just been on my show Frost on Sunday. Talking about his new book, in which he reveals that Sir Nigel Dhrinkskaddie. Is infact a direct decendant of Henry the 8th and his lineage can be traced to a haystack near Hampton Court. A crack team of SAS troops have been requested of Ebay as unfortunatley there's no serving ones available due to a shortage of rope and black coveralls. It's all assigned to America's latest theme park "McWarzone" a franchise of, which is coming to a neighbourhood near you soon. Once enough Squaddies can be mustered and given basic special forces training to know about how to arrange book deals, ghost writing and appearing as special advisers on game shows. They'll remove German Betty, Phil the Greek and all the kids and move them to Neslon Mandela Towers in Peckham Rise.

    Argentinian sources are watching developments with great interest, It's rumoured that an invasion of the Malvinas (Falklands) is only around the corner. Minister for the Argentinian Foreign Office said "The Malvinas belong to Argentine people and so does the Oil on which they sit! England's Claim to them, is as valid as us saying The Orkney Islands belong to us! Appart from the fact we don't want them unless there's oil nearby." The Newly declared People's Republic of Orkney entered the fray on hearing news of oil deposits being suspected in the area "Any attempt from Argentina to invade would be met with strong opposition!" A spokeman freshly returned from the harbour where a whale massacre took place said "We kill everything that comes from the sea, let them come we're ready!" GRRRGGHHH!

    Mr. Bush on hearing the words Massacre, OIL, people's republic said We've suspected them godamn lefty pinko's *astard's of this sort of thing for a while and if it's a massacre they want we'll show them. All of them! That's all for now folks "God Bless Micky Mouse!"