Now, the English are not exactly well-placed to set about criticising foreigners' foreign-language skills.
So here goes:
Why do so many French people, who speak pretty good Hengish, haspirate hall hun-haspirated Henglish words, and yet aven't got the habiliity to uff a little aitche honto words which need them, like arry the ungry ippopotamus, for hexample?
(On a ferry ride from Plymouth to Santander, once upon a time, the Brittany Ferries crew laid on a wine tasting hevent to keep the passengers hamused. We were a pretty hignorant bunch, and the poor girl was trying to ammer the basics into our tiny minds. More in hoak, more is hairy, she kept telling hus. I think this meant that the longer your store your wine in oak barrels, the airier the flavour.)